Practicing Non-Judgment

Practicing non-judgment is an interesting idea.
There is a problem, though.
The very idea of non-judgment is based on judgment.
Do you understand?
To judge something worthy of non-judgment requires judgment.
Seemingly an oxymoron, isn’t it?

This is all pointing at something…

With regard to non-judgment, it’s often believed that our primary focus should be refraining from judging others. I would argue that approach misses a significant point and the root issue.

Our judgment stems from a belief that something is wrong. Judgment stems from the idea that something should have happened that didn’t or that something didn’t happen that should have. These ideations stem from a belief that what did happen shouldn’t have happened the way it did.
That would suggest that nature is flawed and out of balance, wouldn’t it?

Balance is a universal principal.
The cosmos is in a perpetual state of unfolding and folding upon itself.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.
Life is the sorce of decay, and decay is the source of life.
It’s our egoic perspective that often blinds us to balance.
A balance that often isn’t available for us to see,
But is there.

When I was eighteen, my two sisters were killed in a car accident.
That day was devastating.
I was devastated.
My family was devastated.
Here is the thing.
That same day,
Their organs were harvested.
People that were on wait lists got phone calls.
Tears of happiness were shed.
Families were overjoyed.
Loved ones were getting a new lease on life.

My sisters’ deaths instilled a hope in these strangers’ lives.
They were experiencing pure elation.
We were immersed in our deep despair.

I didn’t see or understand this until years later.
All I’m suggesting is that there are alternate perspectives occurring.
So…
All the wrongness and rage I was feeling…
That was limited by my perspective.

This is the key to absolving yourself from judgment.
Recognize you were not wrong to have your emotion.
Give yourself permission to have your emotion, totally and completely.
Don’t get cought in the trap that suggests your emotions are somehow flawed.
Just remember there is an alternative perspective simultaneously occurring.
The very same event that brought you pain also brings balance.
A balance that may never be known.
But a balance all the same.

When they died, I remember wondering why I didn’t cry. My eyes were dry.
The tearless brother. I wondered what was wrong with me. Was I broken?
What a sad thing.
I wish I could reach out to that eighteen year old boy and tell him how normal he was. I wish I could tell him how deep and real his anguish was. I wish I could tell him how right he was. I wish I could tell him the tears don’t tell the tales he thought they did.
What a shame to be filled with judgment.
What a sad thing.
To lose so much and be consumed with how broken you are.

This is what I know.
Renee and Michelle taught me to live.
I see with a clarity.
I know…I know a deep truth.
A truth that comes only through sitting with suffering.

Consciousness is ever expanding…